This side of Heaven
The red tulips that I planted for my dad came up last week. A dear friend gave me the bulbs shortly after my dad passed away last summer. It was the perfect gift. Red was his favorite color. I bought him something in red nearly every birthday and Father’s Day. He was handsome in red.
Of course I didn’t need the tulips to remind me to think about my dad. He is on my mind daily. I miss him. I still want that last conversation with him. I have questions I need to ask him and things I want him to know. I know he is happy and at peace now in the presence of his Christ. I think it befitting that these flowers bloomed the week before Easter– the week before the celebration of our Lord’s resurrection. He came to make all things new. He rose from the grave to deal death a final blow. Death can still hurt us, but it cannot hold those who believe in this Jesus. My dad believed. I believe.
But I still miss him.
In 2011 when I did my first 365 Project, I traveled to Virginia to see my dad alone. I just wanted to visit with him. It was a good time to see him. He was not ill, and we had some nice conversations in his den and at the local restaurant. I am grateful that I was able to do that. I took this photo during that visit. He loved his dog Daisy.
Dad in Red
I wish I didn’t have so many regrets when it comes to my relationship with my dad, but I do. I moved away at 21 to marry my wonderful husband. I tried to stay connected with him over the years but it was difficult with small children and homeschooling. There are a million excuses it seems. None of them seem important now that he is gone. A girl only gets one daddy.
I know someday I will be able to walk with him again in his garden. How he loved planting things in the earth. I will be able to hold those hands that I loved so much. His crystal blue eyes will be sparkling with joy in the presence of his Savior.
There will be no more regret.
Love you dad. I planted tulips for you and my heart is every bloom.
Hosea 13:14 ~
“Shall I intervene and pull them into life?
Shall I snatch them from a certain death?
Who is afraid of you, Death?
Who cares about your threats, Tomb?
In the end I’m abolishing regret,
banishing sorrow” (The Message)
Joy
Farm Flowers
Singing Resurrection Songs
4 Comments
Beautiful sentiments and tulips. My daddy has been gone 27.5 years now – I still want to ask him things, still miss him… I too will look to see my daddy again and walk with him. I don’t know his favorite color though; that saddens me.
Stunning photos, sweet sentiments. I miss my dad, too. Nine years this year.
Blessings on you. I certainly understand the feelings.
I think we all have regrets about our parents and what we didn’t do for them, Mary Anne. I know I do. I love your tulips and I love what you said about your dad, and understand how you feel, as I lost my dad last September at 94 years of age, on the very day he would have celebrated his 70th wedding anniversary if mum hadn’t died three years earlier. How much love they gave us!