365 2014 Day 53 Sunset Rider

This boy has my heart. We chatted on the way to church today about the good old days, when there was more time for dirt bike riding and exploring in the woods. This is the stuff of his childhood. He was homeschooled here on our little farm and he spent a good bit of time with his bike. He loved just being outside, my boy of the sun and sky. When he would tell me he was bored, I would rattle off my favorite Thomas Jefferson quote, “Boredom is the mother of creativity.” It was so true. Just a little bit of quiet and he would come up with some amazing things to do.

I think he misses the quiet of his childhood. I know I do.

On the way home he offered to get out his bike to let me photograph him for my project. I loved this idea. It was a beautiful day on the farm and I am still practicing my lighting techniques. We had so much fun! I don’t have much time with my boy anymore. He is busy with college and music production. I am so proud of this son of mine, not just of what he is accomplishing, but because of who he is.

Gone are the days where my little boy complained about being bored. I treasure those slow days of homeschooling. I wish I could go back in time and tell the younger version of myself not to worry so much. I always wondered if I was doing enough for my children. Now when I see them, I am amazed at God’s goodness. I may not have done everything right but God filled in all the empty spaces with himself. Sometimes he just needs a broken place to shine through. I certainly had those. He proved his goodness to me over and over again. He is always enough.

My heart aches that those days are long behind me now. I miss reading to my children at night. Even now I tear up in the children’s section at the bookstore. I want just a little more time, just a little more boredom to fill. I long to hear “One more page, Mama?” one more time. One more bath time with curls to comb and one more excuse to stay up longer. I miss hearing giggles coming from the upstairs hallway and the stomping of feet down the wooden steps. How in the world did it go by so fast? Being a mom is the best thing I have ever done in this life. I wouldn’t trade it for any photography award or any amount of money. Those three have my heart beating inside them as they go out into this earth, as do the two I have in heaven.

Sigh.

I am so grateful we slowed the clock just a bit today to get these images and have some fun. Thank you, my boy. Sorry to get all sappy about it. Not really. It’s totally worth the sap.

God has done great things.

 

Deuteronomy 10:21 ~”He is the one you praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.”