365 Project Day 308: Alone?

Canon 5D Mark ll, 50 1.2L, 5.0 aperture, 1/1600 shutter, 100 ISO

Sometimes the most difficult things I do are also the most isolating. Following through. Forging a new path. Becoming. Taking new steps. They all feel so frightening and lonesome sometimes.

It seems this is my year for that feeling. When the crowds all walk away and I am left to decide and do, what will I do? Another day on this project?  Will I give up and go to bed (finally!) or spend another night ticking away on a keyboard wrestling down the deep places? The cavernous places that would rather be left undiscovered? It is terrifying to reach into pockets and fear there is nothing left. I pull them inside out, searching for something, for today’s manna. What if I forgot to gather it today?

Thankfully, I have come to the end of me more than once during this project. Daily, really. The truth is, I am never alone, even though I feel the ache of it seeking to swallow me whole sometimes. I am not alone, and it is in these moments, the pressing-through moments, that I know it the most tangibly. God is with me. He is always with me. When my threadbare pockets come up empty, and yet there is enough, always enough, I know I am not alone.

Another image. Another post. Another night knowing God is with me. I am not alone, and you are not either.

Grateful.

Psalm 139:7-10 ~”Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me,  your right hand will hold me fast.”